There He Blows!

My wife caught me the other day.  "Busted, can't be trusted."  It's a day I'll never forget.  "What are you doing? -- let me see!"  She was mortified, and I was embarrassed, quite frankly.  "I can't believe what I'm seeing..."   Yes, my wife was absolutely shocked by my actions... Just when she thought she knew me, too... What moved me to such desperate measures?  "I was vulnerable!"  I'll get to that in a moment.  What matters is that it happened and I have to admit to it...  Yes, that's right... I cried.  "Are you crying?"  Try to understand, my wife's always seen me as unflappable, with nerves of steel.  "My knight in shining armor..."  How I hate to disappoint her.  But here's some good news: Doctors say it's healthy to cry, it's a great stress reliever.  "Are you sure?"  Please understand, some of us were taught that crying's a sign of weakness.    "There's names for crybabies like you!"  I don't like to hold grudges, and I don't mean to blame my parents, but... I'm going to blame my parents.  But all's forgiven.  I feel liberated... "I can cry!  I can cry!"  Okay, but now what do I cry about?  Suddenly I can't muster up a single tear.  That concerns me.  Right when I get the green light to cry, I discover that life is beautiful.  Life is perfect... "Hey, did you see that Lakers playoff loss...?"  Somebody get me a tissue -- now!