Where's The Powder Room?

"Location.  Location.  Location."  When I'm not busy solving many of our world's problems, I dabble in real estate.  In fact, I consider myself somewhat of an expert in that department.  "Expert? -- you?"  Alright, wise guy...  To be perfectly honest, I get amused when I read about those mansions that go up for sale.   "Are you in the market?"  Right now, the only market I'm into sells me 2 lbs. of chorizo.  As far as purchasing a mansion, I'm not interested.  Never will be... "Too expensive for you?"  Please, don't insult me.  "Are you envious of those than can actually afford big homes?"  Now you're getting me mad.  If you must know, there's something about big homes that really bugs me.  "You are dripping with envy..."  I don't drip for anyone!  No one, you hear me?!  Look, if you really must know, I can't get past the idea that these multi-million dollar homes have so many bathrooms.  "Bathrooms?  What do you have against bathrooms?"  Nothing -- especially when I have to use one...  If you'll allow me, awhile back I went to an Open House at one one of those luxury homes.  "How luxurious was it?"  You'll never believe the first thing the real estate agent says to me: "Let me show you the bathrooms."  Really?  For those who know me: Do I look like a guy that spends all his time in the bathroom? (better yet, don't answer that, please) Anyway, that house had so many bathrooms, I ran out of fingers for counting.  "You should've taken off your shoes."  The whole time I'm thinking, "Who actually has time to use all these bathrooms?"   (I'd have to carry a map just to remember where each is located. ) And another thing, there's a lot of pressure in keeping up all those bathrooms.  "Bathroom no. 17 needs more candles!"  Imagine living in a home where double-digit toilet seats need to be put down -- and aren't.  "That's a lot to worry about."  Not to mention -- I'm about to -- all those wet towels that have to be picked up off the floor (my kids are allergic to doing so). Of course, my worst nightmare then comes to mind: "Where's my toothbrush?!  I don't remember where I left my beloved toothbrush!"  I'm sorry all you mansion lovers, but so many bathrooms are a waste of space -- and energy, if you ask me.  "I don't ask you nothin'..."  Uh, let's keep it that way...