You Can Come Down Now!

Protest is good, I guess... "I don't want my vegetables!"  After all, we live in a country where Freedom of Speech is one of our fundamental rights... "No talking during the movie, please!"  Subsequently, there's a woman in the Southwest who found a unique way to protest who-knows-what.  She decided to climb to the roof of her house.  And stay there.  "Is she adding solar panels or something?"  This woman refused to come down for days at a time.  "Not even to re-do her makeup?"  Family members couldn't find a way to get her down.  "I baked you your favorite, sweet potato pie..."  After awhile, everyone in her neighborhood started to worry.  "She's becoming an eye sore."   Personally, I hope there aren't ever any copycats, especially during the holidays.  I mean, I'd hate to hear that Santa skipped homes -- namely mine -- because he spotted angry protesters sitting on their rooftops (so far, I've been a very good boy this year).  At the same time, I have to admire the woman for taking such a strong stance.  Truth be told, I could never protest as vehemently as she did.  "Never?"  Sorry, but I'm being honest.  "I think you're lying."  Frankly, I don't like to protest or make waves (I'm afraid it might upset people).  Especially from a  pointy rooftop.  "Ouch..."  Then again, I could get a lot of reading done while up there... Oh, who am I trying to fool?  I couldn't sit on a roof for very long...  I mean, what if I got hungry?  What if I got a bad case of the shingles?  Sorry, but I can only go so long without my daily vitamins.  (I'd never hear the end of it if I got sick... "I promise, Ma, I'll never do it again...")  I mean, there's gotta be better ways for people to voice their concerns, right?   Ways where we don't have to miss important ballgames... Okay look, even if I was extremely passionate about a cause, I'd surely fall off the roof and cause serious damage to body parts that aren't insured.  Then what?  "Can I sign your body cast?"  I'd have to decline such requests for fear that some wise guy would try to sneak inappropriate messages onto my cast.  "Uh, can you erase that thing about Nantucket.  The drawings, too..."  I just hope my wife doesn't hear about the rooftop protester.  It might give her ideas, might get her thinking... "You'll find me near the satellite dish..."  Huh?  "And I'm not coming down 'til somebody helps me fold clothes!"  Oh boy, something tells me the kids won't be seeing their mom for a long, long time... "Can anybody hear me down there?!  Does anybody care?!"