CRAAAAASH -- "I'll take some ketchup, please!"

Sorry, but I lost count a long, long time ago.  "Then you should count on your fingers and thumbs -- or borrow a long abandoned abacus."  I don't know how many times I've heard about cars crashing into fast food drive-thrus, but it's happened plenty.  "Talk about ruining your appetite."  Tell me, are people really that hungry that they can't steer in a safe and responsible manner when ordering their food?   "All I know is, when I'm starving, all I see in front of me are tacos al carbón -- pedestrians beware!"  If you'll all take a moment -- "I don't have that much time." -- notice how I mentioned 'fast food,' not 'fast car.'  People have to drive slower, keep a foot in the vicinity of the brake pedal.  "Uh, is that the one on the right or the left?"   Hungry drivers also have to pay attention to what's around them, particularly brick and mortar.  "Is that a new rock band?"  There's no other way to put it than to say that people are horrible drivers when they're thinking of food.  "Speaking of food -- I want some!"  I recommend for people to have a snack in their car just to tie them over til that chicken quesadilla's done.  "No quesadilla for me, thank you.  Those do tricks on me.  You see, I'm lactose intolerant and -- "  And I can't tolerate your digestive tract talk, so stop!  "And I thought you cared..."  Look, I'm not claiming to be the world's best driver, but you've gotta be pretty bad behind the wheel to go crashing into a drive-thru.   Imagine the embarrassment: you bring down a wall -- or three -- and then what?  "I'd drive away quietly, hope nobody noticed..."  Does everybody just pretend that nothing happened?  That's gotta be awkward:  "Give me a minute, please, while I get these bricks off my windshield...  Okay, I'm ready: I'll take two cheeseburgers, hold the cheese, please..."  That takes the cake, don't you think?  "I thought you were taking burgers..."  Uh, it's just a saying.  "What I'm saying is that I don't want any cake -- I want burgers!"  I hate the thought of anyone getting hurt at drive-thrus, so maybe we should think outside the box.  "I love Joaquin in the Box!"  No, I mean we should come up with some creative ways to assure safer drive-thrus.  "How 'bout traffic lights?"  You can't put a traffic light at drive-thrus.  "Why not?"  You just can't, that's silly...  "Sorry, just a thought..."  A crossing guard, maybe.  But not a traffic light...