"Would you mind speaking in tongues?"

Hey, I believe in love like a whole lot of people, but at what cost?  "Brother, can you spare a dime?"  I mean, I'm all for Cupid and everything he has to offer -- but at the cost of my tongue?  No thanks.   You see, it appears a man tried to cut off his 'lengua' as a way to show his love for his estranged wife... "Estranged?  That's strange..."  I couldn't agree more... "Why didn't he buy her flowers instead?"  That's what I say... "Diamond rings, the ladies love diamond rings, too!"  Exactly.  Why didn't this guy get something pretty and sparkly instead?  I mean, walking around without a tongue is really serious stuff.  "For once, you're really serious, aren't you?"  Like never before...  To lose one's tongue is right up there with any worst case scenario, like losing a smart phone... "That bad huh?"  All this talk about tongues reminds me of something -- "Let me guess: feet."  No, I just realized I haven't had 'tacos de lengua' in such a long time...  "What are 'takgoez day laingwaw'?"  Tacos de lengua are tongue tacos -- beef tacos to be exact... I used to eat them all the time as a kid.  My mom would add cilantro and onions, a zesty salsa on top...  "Sounds like your mom's a great cook -- and guilty of not having me over for dinner!"  Yeah, for awhile there, I ate lots of tacos de lengua growing up... "How you're not tongue-tied, we'll never know..."  Can I tell you something, but promise not to laugh?  "I don't laugh at anything you say -- or write."  Well, when I was a kid, I believed that eating tongue would help me learn the cow language... "Why, was there an issue to be discussed?  Did you have a beef with cows?"  No, I just wanted to know what stories cows shared with each other while grazing... "That's silly."  I don't think so.  I was curious to know what cows talked, uh, mooed about on their spare time.  I mean, did they fraternize about the weather?  The economy?  How the Texas Longhorns were doing?  "Tell ya what, we better stop right there.  I'm going to look at cows a whole lot differently from now on..."  Really?  I've provided you with a whole new perspective, a new-found appreciation for cows?  "No, actually, all this cow talk got me hungry -- and my steak sandwich is getting cold."  Oh...